Sunday, September 23, 2007
The girls and I live next door to my sister and her family. They are in one side of the semi, the girls and I in the other. Some people would say 'wow, that must be great' being so close to my only sister. In some ways it is nice. We have dinner every Sunday and all we have to do is walk next door. When I was in my deepest, darkest time before I joined AA I called my sister and she was literally there for me in seconds.
The problem is, on a day-to-day basis, I never really see her. My sister, R, is a very private person. Her kids are 'different', especially my neice, A, who is now 16. She's the only 16 year old I know who will ONLY take her written drivers test if it's in Latin. Last week she decided that she was going to graduate a year early from high school and now she's applying to MIT and Yale. Really, that's her.
I find it very difficult going there, not really talking about anything for fear of one of them getting upset that I'm prying into their lives. R is usually doing one of a few things: work, on her cell, emailing on her blackberry, or taking her son to hockey.
Sometimes I find out from the neighbours what is going on in her life. It's weird, but I accept it. It used to really upset me, not being a 'part of' her life and the lives of my only neice and nephew. It still does upset me a bit, but now I can just leave her house and her ways behind me. I realize that is itsn't 'me' she does that to, it's her way and the way of her kids.
R told me a few weeks ago that she and her husband are separating. It's her second marriage, but now she has a great relationship with her first husband (the father of my neice and nephew). The first husband turned out to be gay, so that might have something to do with their marriage not working out. Anyway, R told me about the separation, mainly because she is using the lawyer that I work for and I would find out from work. I really don't know anything else about it. Don't know why, don't know what's happening with her kids going to private schools, and the expensive cars she drives, or the house they are living in. Small problem...she and her business partner own the house that the girls and I are living in. If they move, we will have to move. On top of that, the business partner's daughter was living here and she recently moved.
Now I'm not terribly fond of Toronto, so I don't mind too much if we do have to move away. The problem lies in the life we have built here. The girls go to school litererally around the corner. I work nearby, and my AA meetings are close and convenient. If we move, it will be away from the core of the city. There are too many scummy areas, and horrible neighbourhoods.
I mentioned to my mother that when we move we'll move from the city. She doesn't understand that because to her Toronto is the centre of the universe. She never understood why we moved to BC and why I loved it so much. Any area of Toronto that we could afford rent would be a horrible area. The area we are in is way too expensive. Reality is, we are only here because my sister had this house ready to rent when the girls and I moved from BC. I'm not upset about it, actually not really thinking too much about it. It will be what it will be. I'm not going to stress about it, and we will find a place to live when we need to, and it will be a new home for us.
I guess I needed to vent about things. It bothers me that my sister is the way she is. It bothers me that I don't own my house. It bothers me that I cannot ask my only sister questions about herself and the life of her kids. I accept that, it's one of the things I have learnt since becoming sober. I don't have to agree or even respect other people and their lives, but if I ACCEPT those things, I am a happier person. And really, isn't that what it's all about? Accepting. I think if more people accepted the world would be a happier place. I know I am.
Sunday, September 9, 2007
Lots of stuff going on here....
These are some pictures of things we have been doing. The day after Mandi got here, Aug 31, we went to the Ex (CNE, Canadian National Expabition). We got the girls all-day play passes and they went on tons of rides. They had such a great time and I was content and peaceful watching them have fun.
Heather, Mandi, Heather's friend Emily, and Emily's dad went to Niagara Falls for day. They had a fabulous time. I'm glad Mandi got to see it. It really is a shame to come all the way across the country and not see the Falls.
Also this past week was the first day of school. I took a picture of Heather with 2 of her close friends, Samantha and Mia. They are in the same class this year. It was Leah's first day of real school. You can see from her face how happy and excited she is. Does a mother good to see her children so happy.
We've been enjoying our stay with Mandi a lot. The girls were so happy to see her. Luckily for Mandi, they spent this past weekend with Scott so we can both have a bit of piece and quiet.
Girls come home tomorrow am, then it's back to school again for them.
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
Mandi, our good friend from BC is visiting us for two weeks. We've had a great time so far, and there's still lots more to come.
Heather started Grade 3 today, had a great first day.
Leah's first day of SK (senior kindergarten) is tomorrow.
I have been taking pictures, but haven't downloaded them onto the computer yet.
When I have a few more mintues (yah, right, like that actually happens) I will post more and post pictures.